Heartfelt Desires

What is that SOMETHING?

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The workshop I attended last Saturday in the SFC Icon is entitled, “There’s something about Mary”. Why did I choose this workshop? Actually, I was discerning for a while what to choose. I think it took me 5 times of Facebook opening for several days, and read the list of workshops again and again before the above title struck me. I remember what I felt when I read the lines from the description of workshop. It says, “How in our lowliness, powerlessness, we can see the Lord’s light shine in our lives”. Once, we’ve been in our lowest.

The speaker said, “There is something about Mary, what is that something? We’ve grown curious about that something. But what is it?”

It’s not actually something, but someone. There’s someone about Mary. And that is Jesus. Jesus is the point of Mary. We shouldn’t stop to Mary, because Mary is the vessel towards Jesus. Our devotion to Mary should always lead to Jesus to strengthen our faith in Him.

The speaker presented a picture of Mary looking very disturbed upon hearing what the angel Gabriel had told her, that she’ll become the mother of the son of God. The picture of Mary had shown that she felt unworthy, confused and doubtful of herself. But why is it that among other women during that time, she was chosen to carry in her womb the son of God. It was because of her simplicity, humility and faith.

The implication…. Once or several times in our lives, we received a blessing or are wanting something, but then, we doubt our capabilities that we are deserving of that blessing. In what aspect? A lot. In our career, in discerning for our one true love, etc. For example, we met our ideal man/woman before. And upon knowing them, we’ve felt that we are not worthy of that person or worthy of the love we’ll receive from them. They’re too perfect, too good to be true, too good looking and too kind for us. With those worries, we hide away and locked the door of our hearts. It actually shows lack of self confidence. What we learned from Mary, despite her worries and feeling of inadequacies, she accepted the calling and just trusted God.

I also feel unworthy sometimes. Now, I realized to accept great tasks and responsibilities handed to me and welcome special people in my life. It’s a challenge. God will not give us something we cannot handle. Let’s us trust and have faith in our hearts. Now I know the reason why I was in the seminar, to remove the feeling of unworthiness in my heart. To God, we are always worthy. And we are always enough. GREAT GOD.

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