Found this on my writing pad that I usually place in my bedside table. I always have a writing pad at the bedside because if I have ideas before I sleep or any ideas that pop into my mind (anything and everything under the sun), I can easily write and not forget them. This is true. Once it’s not written, it is forgotten. Do not trust your memory.
And I quote,
There are days when you are very confident, that whatever unfortunate things that happen to you on a day, you can easily brush if off. But there are also days when your self-esteem is at its lowest. You just wanna feel okay by telling yourself, “Everything will make sense in the future, in time.” Count your blessings. Be grateful for the simple needs (basic needs) that you have right now. Don’t compare yourself with other people. You will be fine. This heartbreak will pass.
I’ve written this a long time ago. I can’t remember when. I’ve learned a lot and I can say that I am a better person now than I was before. Through this experience, I have come to know more of the Lord and strengthen my relationship to Him. I have one thing that I pray every night. I pray for forgiveness. I know that I have forgiven myself and I have forgiven Ryan, but if there’s still hurt or regret that lies deep within our hearts, I pray that the Lord will take that away. I pray that Ryan will forgive himself, and that he will forgive me too. That he will forgive the two of us. He didn’t hurt me, neither was I to him. It’s just the timing of our relationship. He really is a good man and I wish him well. Asking for forgiveness not in a sense of getting back together. It means recognising and being grateful for the wonderful memories you have shared with another person even if you didn’t end up together.
Forgiveness is the most powerful tool for us to be at peace within ourselves. Because if God has forgiven me from all my sins, who am I not to forgive. That’s why I pray everyday to always forgive and not hold grudge to anyone. And that I will also be forgiven by the people I hurt in the past and those that I hurt unknowingly.
Time to sleep now. Good night.:)